After a restless Christmas Eve, HMRC’s modern day scrooge, top official Big Jim Harra is haunted by visions of HMRC’s lost glory, present-day struggles and a bleak future. But will he mend his ways in time before he is presented with his massive gold envelope and takes, what he believes to be, a well-earned retirement later this year?
Big Jim Scrooge went wearily to bed on Christmas Eve. He’d done his best to slash costs as much as he could and had been rewarded with a knighthood, so why oh why, were all these people still so critical? Once in bed, Big Jim Scrooge, feeling exhausted, fell asleep.
Christmases past
Having been so tired, Big Jim was surprised to find himself awake at one o’clock with some sort of spectre at the foot of his bed. The Spectre appeared to be female, was dressed all in white and holding a large white clipboard and pen.
Big Jim Scrooge could not resist as she beckoned him to follow her and visit echoes of Christmases past. It was a jolt for him to remember his early days at the tax office decades ago. Staff were motivated to meet their two-week target for dealing with the post. Their training fully supported them in understanding the complex tax system, and each member of the team was familiar with their own cases.
The memories came flooding back. The rapport, camaraderie and interaction with local accountants. The open respect from the public. How had it all possibly gone wrong?
Christmas present
Big Jim Scrooge found he was back in bed as the clock struck two. A second spirit appeared; a gentleman in a three-piece white suit, complete with a white bowler hat and umbrella. The spirit took Scrooge to a nearby call centre; a soulless place where call handlers reluctantly answered queries for which their minimal training had nowhere near adequately prepared them for.
From a mere glance, Big Jim could see that morale was rock bottom. The call handlers might want to do a good job, but with little preparation, minimal training and unachievable goals, what chance did they have? In call after call, they could sense the frustration from taxpayers. Customers – that’s how they were told to refer to them. Yet how could these customers get help to speed up their repayments or change their PAYE codes, it seemed impossible!
Christmases future
Sitting on the edge of his bed as the clock struck three, Big Jim Scrooge was confronted by a cloaked spectre of an old man, with long white hair, a smooth face, and a bright light emanating from his head. As Scrooge was led into the future, he saw grey soulless offices with minimal levels of staff all of which appeared to be depressed.
He also noticed IT techs struggling manfully, but failing to maintain programmes that were not fit for purpose, but perhaps, had the system been adequately tested, perhaps it might have been able to cope with so many quarterly submissions.
But under Scrooge’s direction, the system had only tested a very narrow range of scenarios, with the final version being introduced before the result of the trial had even been looked at or assessed. It was hardly surprising to see that a poorly-trained skeleton staff were struggling to process the increasing numbers of submissions and unable to cope with queries and criticism from all sides.
Can Big Jim possibly sort out the mess?
Big Jim Scrooge didn’t know whether he’d tossed and turned for hours or had only a moment’s sleep. He found himself awake in the morning with the mind-blowing realisation that he had the chance to put the tax world right. He could do it, that he now knew. He could cancel the doomed IT project and put the hundreds of millions saved into training and recruitment. He’d dramatically improve service, re-open local offices and re-engage with accountants.
As accountants were members of professional bodies and had training and ethics, Scrooge could give them access to many simple tasks, such as amending PAYE codes. Such delegated tasks, which merely collect an estimate of tax due, would have an end of year reconciliation which would ensure no tax was lost.
By engaging with accountants, he could allow them greater access to HMRC’s systems and therefore do part of his staff’s work, meaning that phone calls and waiting times would be dramatically cut. Never mind the knighthood – this could guarantee a seat in the House of Lords for Big Jim Scrooge!
Accountant’s view
My thanks go to Jane Wanless who first came up with the idea of ‘Harraneezer’ (aka Big Jim) Scrooge and I sincerely hope that you’ve enjoyed my adaptation of Charles Dickens’ classic novella.
